Wednesday, 30 March 2011

Covering It Up

Sometimes I feel as though I'm being medicated into accepting things which make me unhappy, rather than trying to change or reject them. I'm unhappy with them even when on medication, but instead of acting upon the feelings of unhappiness, I just accept things as they are - not wanting to of course, but having no other choice but to do so.

"I do not want to live in a kind of society where these things are acceptable any more."

Before I would cry, I would often use various methods to make these thoughts go away. Without these methods, they just float through my head without any outward response. Any response is internal, a response of disgust, but one I can't find any kind of outlet for.

Sometimes these things extend to those close to me and I have to act like it doesn't bother me.